Top 10 40 and over club and reasons why, Top 10 overall hottest chicks and reasons why, hottest chicks under 25, fat chicks, and I thank my staff.

I've decided to dedicate this entire blog entry to the one thing I'm crazy about, the one thing I can't seem to figure out, the one thing that is long overdue . The Ladies! First my top 10 hottest chicks 40 and over.
Starting with number 10.

10. Ellen Degeneres... (the reason why is because is she's funny ass hell and she's one of my idols and just like me she likes chicks).

9. Martha Stewart....(Reason: Any woman that can make things that spectacular with her bare hands without directions is exceptionally gifted. Plus she's a blonde, and blondes are just not that smart, but she's the exception.

8. Meredith Veira (Reason: Don't know)

7. Diane Sawyer (She's blonde, she has great legs and she's the next Barbara Walters. (who you'll find later on my list).

6. Barbara Walters (see told ya) (reason: look at her she's 74 and still that hott, you can tell she takes great care of herself, and you gotta love that, plus she's single.

Now for the Top 5 this was hard I mean seriously I had a lot of trouble with picking these, but here's my list.

Number 5. Teri Hatcher (She's on the hottest show, other than the L-word, she has beautiful dark hair, and check out the layout she has in the March issue of FHM. Plus she's ongle and I heard she hasn't had sex in two years. Boy I might just change my career from a journalist to a plumber so I unclog her drain if you know what I mean.

Number 4. Hillary Clinton ( she's hott, smart and all that power she has. Need I say more and According to Bill Clinton she's single.

Number 3. Mariska Hargitay (the only reason i got into watching Law & Order SVU, gosh she is hott, she's a cop , that's quailifies her for neing on my hott40 and over right there, especially when she's running down criminals with that gun in those tight shirt she be wearing. Amazing stuff.

Number Tied-2 Oprah Winfrey. (she's loaded, not only financially, but look at the bod on Oprah c'mon she's
got it all and she's also very single, well this according to Dr. Phil.

Number Tied-2 Marcia Cross, yeah another desperate housewive, she's tall, smart (has a master degeree in psychology) and she's a red head, and also did you see her in that episode when she went to her husband's hotel and unrobe from that furcoat, thank god for silk.

Now the moment we've all been waiting for, the Number 1 hottest chick 40 and over,the consensus #1. My girl, the reason I wake up in the morning, the reason I rise on my levis about five times, in one sitting. Drumroll please..............................Katie Couric. To me she's just one step ahead of the rest, she's stylish, smart, sarcastic, mean and did I mention those short skirts and sexy glasses(oh oh the glasses, that's what won me over. Plus she's single, and she's the rason I'm a virgin, because I'm holding onto it for her to take, this is the first time I have told anybody this, but yes it's true. that's the reason, why I'm saving up all my money (well as soon as I get a job) to visit the today show this summer, and hopefully, we make eye contact, that should be easy with my lazyeye, and she takes me all of me.

Here are Other 40 and over notables that almost made my list, but probably will have a chance next year
(Glenn Close, Pat Summit (University of Tenessee womens Coach) Linda Cohn, Chris Mckendry (both of espn). Jennifer Granholm (governor of Michigan) Reba Mcintyre,Heather Locklear Meg Ryan,Faith hill, Barbara Streisand, Campbell Brown, The local maillady (boy she looks hott, especially when my dog kaylop is chasing her down the street. Diane Keaton, Robin (from the Howard stern show) Marai shriver, Felicity Huffman, My liile ister's 4th grade teacher Mrs. Wilderman, Mrs Fox (my economics teacher in tenth grade) and last but not least
Mrs. Butterworths.

Now the Top 10 overall hottest chicks:
10. Jaclyn smith (reason why she's number 10 and not higher because c'mon she sells her brand to Kmart)

9. Renee Zelwegger (when she has to put on weight for those Bridget Jones movies, did you see the size of her ass)

8. Marcia Cross (hott,tall, smart redhead)

7. Jessica simpson (she would be higher but she's married to Nick lachey, and that just does it for me.

6. Oprah Winfrey. (money to go with that T&A)

5. Mariska Hargitay (Female Detective, please come and do a search warrant on me.)

4. Catherine-Zeta Jones (doesnt make anysense to be that perfect, her only flaw is that she's married to that old hag Michael Douglas)

3. Sandra Bullock (no reason) and eva Mendes (Check out her GQ as from way back when..

2. Jeniffer Aniston (hott, and hopefully she'll divorced, the only reason I watched friends)

1. Katie Couric (yeah okay you can say I'm obsess but it's always about the mornings for me. Oh and scarlett johanssen, oh my god talented, beautiful and her voice gets me aroused. Halle Berry Hale Berry to so yeah. 3 number 1's

Top 10 under 25: No mine isn't that cheesy ass Teen People, this is the real deal, plus mine is all female well except one. (with that one being me)


10. Mischa Barton (The O.C sucks)
9. Kristen Dunst (Great in bring it on)
8. Lindsay Lohan (woulda been higher , but she was banging that guy from taht 70s show ehhh....
7. Suchin Pak (Take a dip in that Soy Sauce)
6. Kate boswortht (just hott, plus she's was dating my boy Orlando Bloom)
5. Amy Lee (from Evanescence) talented music wise and any chick who ca play guitar is hott.
4. The Bush Twins (the only reason why I voted for Bush,oh and his wife too.)
3. Kim clijsters (tennis phenom, and boy she knows how to use that racket
2. Scarlett Johannsen (the most talented actress in the business today, and she ain't bad to look at eiither.

And another drumroll please (stole this from my neighbor....., c'monthis things gotta work drumroll please....sh*t, drumroll please, okay now I'm mad, alright here we go Drumrollplease......
And the hottest star under 25 is.....okay stop with the druumroll, the hottest star is Me, I'm the hottest star, I have it all the looks, the genius personality, the body, and the sexy lazyeye, I got one to prove it. But only if I had the money eh.... So yeah their you have it numero Uno is CHUCKO......

Now this next list might take up some room This is my hottest fat chick list..(anything goes with this list)
This is my 160 and over club, please no civil suits..

10. Star Jones (when you're legally blind like me she isn't that bad loking when i take my bifocals off).
9. Bette Midler (that hero song makes me cry)
8. Ricki Lake (she didn't have a lake back their more like the pacific ocean, but i love it)
7. Shelley Smith (chick knows her sports)
6. Kristie Alley (Fat actress is a great show, well so far)
5. Reese witherspoon (Hott, especially when pregnant)
4.Pam Grier (bonus points for being on the L-Word and she just looks better now, than when she was Foxxy brown). I think that's it I think these chicks are so fatt they probably ate the klat three remaining spots on my list shame on you KRISTIE ALLEY!


Well before I go i promised my staff, that I would thank them at the conclusion of my Top 10 lists, because without those guys these list would not have been possible, they spent hours and hours drinking flat faygo Root beer and putting these together, they wouldn't be posted for the greatest people in the world to observe (anybody who visits my website is the greatest person in the world, yes including you Ricky Martin. If it wasn't for those great, smart intellectual, hardworking people, these list are based on appearances, brains, who their sleeping with, who their not sleeping with (including Ricky Martin), how much publicity they get, and the size of their ears, and who eats at Taco bell and wears Halter Tops ( yes that does include Ricky Martin, okay you to kristie alley she wants the 12 Chalupas and Fat Free water to go.....

Okay here are the folks who put thislist together.

Editor-in-chief: Chuck Jones
Senior Writer: Chuck Jones
Staff Editor: Chuck Jones
Advertising: Guru: Chuck Jones
Assitant Senior Writer: Chuck Jones
Assistant to the Assistant senior Writer: Chuck Jones
Post Executive: Chuck Jones
Illustration Manager: Chuck Jones
Assistant Editor: Chuck Jones
Editorial Director: Chuck Jones
Assistant to the Assitant to the Assitant: Chuck Jones
Briilliant brain behind everything: Chuck Jones
Hott Guy that gives everybody low self-esteem: Chuck Jones
The Hott Guy that even makes the straightest guy turn heads: Chuck Jones
The hott guy that got 3 egg rolls in his bag instead of two: Chuck Jones
The Hott guy that will take not only your daughter and mother, and your grandma to: Chuck Jones
The Hott guy that brought the whole staff Flat faygo, why he company's wine: Chuck Jones
The hott guy that forgot to pay the elderly stripper for the lapdance and is now being chase out of the Senior citizens Strip bar by 3 bouncers: Chuck Jones
The hott guy that just got arrested for doing 65.11111111111111010101 in a 65mile speed zone: Chuck Jones
The Loser guy that just got married to his cellmate at the tacobell down the street, and had 4 MexiMelts on topof each other as their wedding cake, and who will spend his Honeymoon behind the Cash Register at Chi Chi's: Ricky Martin. This is Chuck signing off.....